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Entertainment July 8, 2017
Because Louis knows how to innuendo just right.
Photo by suits.estilo via InstagramThe double entendres behind Louis Litt’s quotes suits Louis better than he realizes. We actually feel like these moments are when he’s being the best him.
It suits everyone else in the firm, too, because they’re hilarious. Although, sometimes these comments have gotten him in trouble with the HR department. Regardless, his jokes bring light into a commonly dreary office.
Once you’re on good terms with Louis, the good times start rolling. And because he’s basically a professional at sexual innuendos, we felt it was only necessary to make a Littastic article and highlight some of our favorite Louis Litt quotes.
Louis Litt: Pens, Donna. The new quartermaster, Barbara L. Tottingham, will not buy us any more uni-balls. There’s not one single uni-ball in this entire firm.
Donna: Please stop saying uni-ball.
Louis: No, I will not. Stuck with these stupid plastic things that keep breaking.
Donna: So buy your own pen.
Louis: Bu– okay. There are two things in this firm that I hold very sacred – my uni-balls and my raspberry Bran bars.”
Louis: Athletes coming out is all the rage now. And guess what his favorite sport is… Basket… Ball.
Donna: Oh, my God. Shut the front door.
Louis: No, shut the back door.
Donna: Okay, Louis, now that we’ve firmly established his gayness, why would he think you’re gay? I mean, you’re straight as an arrow.
Louis: I may have said that I eat cock for breakfast, lunch and dinner.
Donna: WHAT?
Louis: It was a different kind of cock, Donna.”
Stu: What kind of dildo puts bran bars and prune juice in a lease agreement?
Louis: This dildo. This dildo right here.
Stu: Are you nuts?
Louis: No. I’m your worst nightmare, because this quivering angry dildo isn’t going away until it gets its satisfaction.”
Louis: Donna, the kind of wood you get says everything you need to know about what kind of man you are: how hard or soft it is; how much it bends when you’re working it.
Donna: I get the picture Louis.
Louis: Making Tara love my wood is the first step toward making her love me!
Donna: Okay Louis, calm down.
Louis: No, Donna I don’t want to calm down, because all I can think about is my wood!
Donna: So tell me how many different kinds of wood have you sampled in your day?
Louis: All of them. Mahogany, Chestnut, Walnut, all the nuts…
Donna: Ebony?
Louis: Oh, don’t get me started on Ebony. When I see ebony, I want to put my hands all over it. Donna: Oh, God.
Louis: I want to live in it. I want to smack it, hit it, rub it down. I just want to eat it.
Donna: [laughs]
Louis: What’s so funny?
Donna: Nothing. I just think that a man needs to follow his heart and choose the wood that just feels right.
Louis: Donna, I need you to help me feel my wood.
Louis: Yeah, and look how you turned out.
Nigel: Graduating Summa Cum Laude from both Cambridge and Harvard is quite the failure. Your parents’ choice to “homeschool,” much better.
Louis: Okay, that was only till I was ten, and my mother’s science fair was legendary.
Nigel: You must be so proud of your uncontested blue ribbons.
Louis: Okay, you know what, I’m not gonna let you shatter the glass that I spent years blowing. And I’m certainly not gonna let the likes of you tell me who I can and cannot blow.
Funny suits Louis way more than angry. Louis’ naive thoughts and over-excitement make him a great friend and an even funnier conversationalist. This is a huge part of why even when you hate Louis, you still just have to love him.
