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“Ivanka, Can we have a minute? Like…without your dad and brothers,” starts a hilarious College Humor video directed at Ivanka Trump.
“Donald, if you’re watching, this video is just gonna be a bunch of ladies talking about babies and periods,” it goes on, in a farcical effort to dissuade the outspokenly misogynistic Republican presidential nominee.
“Are we alone? Okay great…WHAT IS GOING ON!?” demands one of the many women featured in the PSA-style sketch. The actors then proceed to urge Ivanka to leave the campaign and even the family business for a more palatable life outside of the reach of her fathers, ahem…grabby hands.
READ MORE: Will an Anti-Trump Boycott Sink Ivanka Trump’s Brand?
“You do not need these people,” the comedians enourage Ivanka. “You are an intelligent, well-educated woman, with a spectacular resume, and you’re smoking hot! And, I know that because your dad keeps telling everybody about it. You know that is weird,” they continue, referencing the countless times Donald Trump has made us all, not least of all Ivanka, uncomfortable by mentioning how hot his daughter is and what a shame it is he can’t date her.
The women go on to sympathize with Ivanka, who’s admittedly in a strange position, being that she has been supported her father during his presidential campaign while his unpopularity with opponents has already begun to threaten her own fashion brand.
“We all get it, but you’re not fooling anyone. We can all see you’re not into it,” they tell her. Then, the video provides Ivanka with other, potentially more-fulfilling options to staying and supporting her father.
READ MORE: ‘Pigs, Slobs and Dogs’: How Trump Courts Female Voters
“Wouldn’t it be funny to see how fast your dumbf*** brothers would tank the company without you?” Muses one spokeswoman.
Another uses comedy to criticize the more serious issues surrounding Donald’s platform: “At the RNC your whole speech was about equal pay and paid maternity leave. You know they’re not going to do that right?”
In the end, whether it’s because Ivanka feels the obligation to remain “loyal to the family” or because she loves “gold chairs and mail-order steaks” more than preserving her own integrity, the video makes one message very clear: It’s time to get out.
“Or at least vote for Hillary; It’ll be our little secret.”
