Having a baby changes everything. Some of the most noticeable changes happen to your body. These physical changes can negatively impact the way you feel about yourself. A study from the Netherlands at the University of Tilburg, shows that having a baby can affect your overall self-esteem for years. Researchers found that even after three years postpartum, most of the 84,000 woman surveyed still had self-confidence issues.
To any woman who has had a baby, this is an obvious no-brainer. Its common to struggle with self-love and confidence after a baby. Even if you were a confident woman prior to your pregnancy, society’s emphasis on body image makes it hard not feel bad about the changes to your body.
Lots of people assume that when you’re pregnant you feel and look like a glowing goddess. For most that couldn’t be further from the truth. Sure, Beyoncé looked fabulous when she made her pregnancy announcement but, I’m sure even she felt like shit. It’s hard to feel like a “goddess when you are swollen, nauseous and your bladder can’t hold much. After the baby arrives you still look pregnant and leave basically wearing a diaper yourself. So glamorous right?
Its hard to feel great about yourself when all this is happening to your body. What you need to remember though is that every woman who gives birth goes through these same unpleasant physical changes.
Stressing over your postpartum body will happen. You may resent it and critique every change you see. My body after pregnancy no longer felt like mine. It felt like I had been transplanted into someone else’s body.
People will tell you how your body did such an amazing thing and that you should be happy and proud. Still, that doesn’t change how you feel when you look at yourself. Even feeling pretty okay with myself my entire life I took a heavy beating.
It can also be difficult to love yourself when your hormones are trying to adjust back. It’s common to experience postpartum depression (PPD.) Published statistics vary, but the most cited stats are that either one in seven or one in five women will suffer from postpartum depression. If you are experiencing signs of postpartum depression and you can’t seem to resolve the issue, don’t hesitate to seek professional help.
Below are tips on how to show yourself self-love postpartum.
Stop looking back at pictures and talking about your pre-baby body. Instead practice being present in your body right now, and taking things day by day. Focus on the now not the past or future.
Try staying off your phone for a bit. Social media can be the worst thing for you. Especially when you are trying to build up your confidence again. If you do go on social medial unfollow any account that makes you feel inferior in any way.
It doesn’t matter how you decide to treat yourself, just do it. Get a massage, book a hair appointment, go out to dinner, buy something you want. Do something for you and for you only.
Whether it be with yourself, someone you trust, or a licensed professional, talk it out. Just talking about your concerns and feeling out loud can help. Writing it out on paper can also be a great way to express yourself.
At the end of the day, you did create a freaking human and that in itself is pretty unbelievable. So remember, be kind and show yourself some self-love, compassion and patience.
