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Inspiration August 30, 2017
Think Jessica Pearson from "Suits," Amelia from "Grey's Anatomy" or Gandalf from "Lord of the Rings."
With a rising set of people willing to give a helping hand to the upcoming generation, many people are wondering what is a mentor, exactly?
They might have heard of life coaches and advisors, believing that those roles are interchangeable. However, that’s not necessarily the case. Although your mentor could be all three of these things, one doesn’t equate to the other.
A life coach can be seen as someone who is trying to get you to a specific goal. You may be struggling to get a job, and they help you throughout the entire preparation and application process. An advisor has a similar short-term role. You may be trying to graduate, so you obtain an academic advisor. Or maybe you want to get a promotion. An advisor gives you information on how to obtain it.
A mentor, on the other hand, is so much more.
Dictionary.com defines a mentor as a wise and trusted counselor or teacher. The dictionary entry also includes the word, “train,” which explains what a mentor does a bit more accurately.
The root word in PIE, mentos, means “intent, purpose, spirit [and] passion.” Additionally, it is compared to the Sanskrit root, man-tar, and Latin root, mon-i-tor, that respectively mean “one who thinks” and “one who admonishes.”
What is a mentor for? Well, if you compare and combine meanings that contribute to the word, the understanding becomes a bit clearer.
The role and responsibilities of a mentor are vast and wide-reaching. Your relationship with them lasts much longer because trust and understanding are very important to this relationship.
With their wisdom, they guide you. They will instill in you purpose and intent. Moreover, they can rouse your passions and uplift your spirits. They train you to be the best that you can be because they have the wisdom and compassion to do so. This term also applies to more specific things. You could enlist a spiritual mentor or a career mentor. Situations where they maintain specific areas in your life.
This distinction is important because it’s not a one-way street. Mentors give to mentees and a mentee gives back. However, there are two goals in the relationship. While a mentee needs guidance, support and wisdom, a mentor needs honesty, receptiveness and growth.
Mentees must be honest with their mentors regarding their dreams, failures, goals and fears. They must be receptive to their mentor’s advice and remain perseverant in trying to achieve the goals they set out for you.
Another important aspect of the relationship stems from respect and trust. Mentors and mentees must have open communication, must make time to learn and understand one another and they both must remain consistent. Without these things, a mentor/mentee relationship won’t establish.
You don’t want to feel like you have wasted your time and neither does your mentor. So, make sure you spend extra time researching your mentor. You must know if your personalities will mesh or if they are in the right place in their own lives to supply you with what you need before you ask.
A mentee should also make sure they are in a place to supply what the mentor may need. Some people who would be great mentors might be hard to reach. So, don’t be afraid to offer some services in exchange for theirs. Can you dog sit for them? What about if they have a website? Can you help with user experience or help their social media outreach? All these things are very important to consider when trying to make a huge investment in someone and asking them to make such a huge investment in you.
Finding opportunities to be sucessful have gotten harder and harder. No matter what walk of life you may be in, there are obstacles standing in your way. If you come from an older generation, you may be completely lost in the new digital era that acts as a huge part of all jobs now. If you’re from a younger generation, your goals and aspirations may be far bigger than the opportunities allotted to you.
Mentors aid in your progress and they can make things easier to obtain. It’s important you understand that they make the goals more obtainable. They don’t make life easier. They might train you harder than life has done in the past. However, this is because they know your goals can only be achieved if you become stronger, faster, wiser, etc. And a change like that only comes with adversity.
Ask yourself, who is a mentor in your life? You might have one and you haven’t even realized it. But if you don’t, that’s fine too. There are many resources to help you find one if you can’t obtain one yourself.
The National Mentoring Partnership offers a large network to find your mentor. Or for more intimate connections, try smaller companies like Entity Magazine’s mentorship program or other companies with similar programs. However, don’t be afraid to find someone locally who can also help you. An email and coffee can go a long way. Just don’t forget to carry everything you’ve learned with you.
