Recent Posts
Mentorship December 4, 2017
Don't underestimate yourself.
How many time has your mother repeated “you are strong” to your face, but it still never seems to sink in?
Ironically, some of the strongest women are also the most unaware of their strength. It’s similar to how English learners struggle to teach their first and only language to someone, or how pre-calc students might struggle to teach basic addition to kindergarteners. Strength is who they are, not a character they have spent years trying to play.
Here’s how you’ll know if you’re one of these strong women… without even knowing it.
You are strong, and many strong women naturally become strong leaders. However, being a strong leader does not always mean you instantly grab at every leadership opportunity you get.
According to business transformer Martin Webster, among the top 10 qualities of good leaders are compassion, flexibility and impartialness. Your bosses in the future may surprise you by giving you the reins on a huge project, which might seem like a burden if it’s a bunch of busy work. However, it shows that you don’t necessarily care about the prestige of leadership as much as getting the job done.
Strength does not have to come off as intimidation… but sometimes it just does. This can be because of your talent, your intellect or simply your pseudo-immunity to any non-constructive criticism. When someone is “intimidated” by you in a positive way, you made a strong impression on them, but not a negative one.
Have you ever listened to multiple friends’ complaints about fights within a romantic relationship, and you’ve tried really hard to empathize… but for some reason, you couldn’t? You certainly had disagreements with people, serious ones at that. But you’ve never reached the point where voices are raised and feelings are hurt past the point of no return. Why is this?
Well, you’ve always subconsciously required respect from your relationships, romantic or otherwise. If a relationship is borderline disrespectful, you’ve always dropped it before it becomes a long-term investment.
When people have breakdowns, they don’t choose an emotionally unstable woman to pour out their soul to. They need a brick house, so to speak; someone they could throw basically any curveball at and they still stand strong.
Ever had strangers basically pour out their souls to you after a good five minutes of conversation? Yeah, it’s a vibe thing. If they sense you’re strong enough to take it, and they’re about to lose it, you better be ready to hear the longest rant of your life.
You are strong, which means you’re probably fiercely independent. This doesn’t mean you’re a loner; in fact, independent women are often some of the most extravagant extroverts you know. However, it is difficult to watch something done for you that you could easily do yourself.
If you struggle on a base-level with a man opening your door for you, doing the dishes, washing your car or even picking up the check, this could be the one time your strength works against you.
People, especially in relationships, may have acts of service as their main love language. This means that they really enjoy doing things for the people they love. In order to love that person properly, you should let them express their appreciation for you how they see fit, even if it’s just in simple ways.
So if you share more than one of these traits, you might be much stronger than you realize. Just remember that sometimes it’s okay to not be strong… then you can have a strong support system of your own.
