Relationships May 28, 2018
"I really, really, really like you."
“He hasn’t said the exact words ‘I love you,’ but he doesn’t have to. I can just tell.”
“I bet he’s just wondering when to say ‘I love you.'”
“It’s this unspoken thing between us. It’s more true than if we had ever said it out loud.”
Sound familiar? If you’ve heard this sentiment from any of your friends, you may have indulged in a mental face palm, or perhaps one of those rigid smiles that is desperately trying to hide the truth.
Men who are not ready to be in a long-term relationship will usually not say “I love you.” Instead, they will use an assortment of stand-in phrases in its place, hoping that will appease you for the moment without making any promises. That way they don’t have to worry about when to say “I love you.” After all, saying “I kind of like you,” comes with significantly less emotional risk for both of you.
What words, you may ask? Well the following phrases are common “I love you” substitutes, but the list is certainly not limited to the following:
1. You’re just really great.
2. You’re the coolest.
3. My mom would love you.
4. I like you.
5. I really like you.
6. I really, really like you. (And yes, grown-ass adults let these words out of their college-educated mouths).
7. You’re a really special girl.
8. You are the most amazing thing that has ever happened to me.
9. You are the most beautiful girl I’ve ever met.
10. I can never imagine not being with you.
11. I wish I could be here with you forever.
12. I’ve never trusted anyone like I trust you.
13. You’re not like the other girls.
15. I’ve never felt this way with anyone else.
16. There’s something different about you.
17. I feel like I can really be myself around you.
18. I really like being around you.
19. You make me feel so alive.
20. Literally any sentence involving the words “forever” or “always.”
21. I appreciate you.
22. I adore you.
23. I have feelings for you.
24. You make everything make sense.
25. You’re the only one who understands me.
26. You feel like home.
27. I feel so safe with you.
28. I just don’t feel like I deserve to love you.
29. I am fascinated by you.
30. I am intrigued by you.
31. And last but not least…
Now again, hearing these phrases isn’t necessarily a bad thing. He might be wondering when to say “I love you”, and so he pulls out a few of these suckers instead of accidentally blurting it out too early in the relationship.
However, if you’ve said the magic three words (and he has not), these phrases are not acceptable substitutes. Tell him what you need out of your relationship, and if he can’t offer that, then you can find someone who will.
