What are you most afraid of? Does your heart race when you stand at the edge of a balcony? Do you still believe that there are monsters lurking in the shadows? Are you afraid of ending up alone? Regardless of your personal phobia, the world is a scary place.
Whether you’re afraid of the creatures that crawl around in your house or the looming darkness at the end of a lifetime, fear is a powerful feeling. It can overcome your emotions, cloud your judgment and plague your thoughts. Because of this, fear is not something that people want to experience, especially when it hinders the quality of their life.
Thankfully, fear can be overcome.
According to The Art of Living, “Fear is nothing but love upside down.” In order to explain this statement, The Art of Living talks about how most people are afraid of something they don’t like or something unknown to them. You can be afraid of not succeeding in life, of dying or you can even be frightened by the thought of presenting a project in front of a group of people. All these things are terrifying because they are unsure or unclear.
So, in order to conquer fear, you must figure out how to build understanding. Here are ways to help you attain that clarity and overcome your fears.
Before you can even begin to try to overcome something, you have to be aware of the way your fears become overpowering. You also must know what scares you.
For example, are you afraid of clowns in general or are you just afraid of their makeup? Are you afraid of being alone or are you just afraid of getting your heart broken? You have to become an active observer of your own thoughts and emotions.
The Art of Living suggests actively facing fears you may have had as a child. According to their website, things that happen in the past often end up bothering you in the present. For example, if a dog bit you as a child and you hold on to that memory, you will most likely be afraid of dogs in your adulthood. In order to ameliorate these fears, you tend to stay away from dogs.
What would happen, however, if you chose to forget the reason you were afraid? What would happen if you left that memory in the past?
The Art of Living uses children as examples. According to them, “Children [aren’t] afraid of anything because they have no impressions. But as we grow up, we gather a stock of good and bad experiences that become impressions.” These experiences then turn into fears. In order to overcome these fears, choose to believe that not all dogs are alike and that not all dogs are going to bite you.
Many fears are rooted in false beliefs. For example, some people are afraid of flying because they are afraid to crash. But, as Curiosity says, the chances of you dying in a plane crash are one in 11 million for every 1.2 million flights. In fact, the chances of you dying in a car or traffic accident are astoundingly higher – one in 5,000. Does this make you feel better?
Our imagination is what allows fear to thrive. People often put themselves in worst-case scenarios simply because they don’t know any better. Therefore, do research, talk to other people and stay curious about what scares you. Learning about your fears may help you find the strength needed to face them.
Feelings of fear and anxiety often go hand in hand. According to Psych Guides, anxiety disorders lead people to feel “fearful or uncertain almost all the time.” The AWARE model for coping with anxiety may be a good way for you to overcome your emotions. Specialty Behavioral Health explains the AWARE model this way:
Acknowledge Anxiety. Don’t fight your anxiety. Instead, accept it as a feeling that everyone experiences. Anxiety is a sign that your nervous system is working and that you are alive.
Watch Anxiety. First, assign a number to rate the intensity of your anxiety. This will help you realize that not all anxiety is the same. Not only that, but assigning an intensity rating shows you that anxiety peaks and decreases at certain times. Doing this will help show you how “emotion is time-limited.”
Act through. Similar to the fear-of-dogs example, you shouldn’t continue to avoid your anxiety. Do what you can to live with it or to face it. Avoiding fears and anxieties will only foster its growth.
Repeat process. This step is important in understanding that overcoming something this powerful takes practice and time.
Expect the best. According to Specialty Behavioral Health, “Each episode is a fresh try. Try to notice even small gains.”
Another way to combat fear is to think of something more important than your fear. As the great Franklin D. Roosevelt once said, “Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the assessment that something else is more important than fear.”
People who are afraid of dying often turn to religion. This kind of faith brings solace to the unknown. Other people also turn to mantras. “Love others” can be a mantra. If you, for instance, are afraid to trust someone, believing that loving others is more important can help you overcome the fear of trusting. If you believe that support is bigger than your fears, then reaching out to your loved ones can help give you the strength to face them.
Really, it doesn’t matter which method you choose, as long as it’s something that helps you understand how powerful you truly are. Fear can be debilitating, but with practice, curiosity and understanding, it can be overcome. It is, indeed, possible to learn to love the things that make you afraid.
