Relationships October 1, 2016
It happens almost overnight. Your sweet, loving offspring who used to tell you everything has suddenly transformed into a moody, door-slamming, rebellious teenager. It can almost feel like an alien has taken over the body of your child and suddenly you, a typically collected woman, have lost your footing. Everything you thought you knew about being a good mother seems to have gone out the window.
The good news? Help is on the way … if you are willing to look for it.
Most first-time parents can agree that parenting classes were fundamental to getting through the first years as mom and dad. From birth classes to breast feeding to play dates and social skill development, we all need a little help from time to time.
But why do we forget that parenting classes are just as important during the teenage years? Maybe we forget that, as parents, we are growing along with our little bundles of joy. Just as our teenagers are experiencing the growing pains of adolescence, we are experiencing the growing pains of parenthood.
Whatever the reason, one fact is certain: When it comes to raising a teenager, parenting classes offer plenty of benefits. ENTITY is here to break down the top four reasons why every parent of a teenager should become a student again!
We all remember how challenging junior high and high school were; the hostile takeover of emotions and hormones was at times overwhelming. As an adult, you look back with trepidation at your younger and moodier self. You happily think how glad you are to have escaped that awkward time. And then you suddenly realize that you have a teenager on your hands and you have to deal with high school all over again.
Your own experiences as a teenager may have colored how your parent your teenage child. Maybe your parents never gave you a curfew and you ended up struggling with the freedom at a young age, so you now strictly enforce a 9:30 p.m. curfew on your teenagers “for their own good.” Or maybe your parents had a “10 Commandments of the House” poster, which listed all of the house rules, hanging in your kitchen … so now, you kick “rules” to the curb in your own home. However your past has influenced you, parenting classes, according to Child Abuse Prevention Coordinator Carol Weigold, can give you a “new perspective on your parenting style and your relationship with your children.”
You probably often tell your child that they need to see things “from your perspective” or change their attitude toward a certain situation. Parenting classes, however, can act as a reminder that you need to listen to your own advice.
Did you ever reach out to classmates when you struggled on a calculus assignment? What about calling your mom for comfort after experiencing your first broken heart? Asking for help from people in a similar boat is merely human nature, and attending parenting classes offers the same benefit of receiving advice from others. As Lifestyle.com explains, parenting classes connect you with people experiencing the same issues. Not only can this companionship keep you from feeling alone, but it can also reveal the various techniques different parents use to cope with and solve the same issue.
In essence, parenting classes can act as a life preserver in a sea of uncertainty and doubt, especially as your child moves into one of the most emotional and hormonal times of his or her life. Reaching out for help in the form of parenting classes can also show your teenager that he or she can also reach out for help when he or she needs it.
As good parents, you can’t just talk the talk – you must walk the walk too. Staying informed can help you with both goals. According to the Montgomery County Office of Drug and Alcohol 2004-2005 Risk Assessment Survey, “Family management problems… are one of the top three risk factors in the county that leads to substance abuse among teens. These included: lack of clear expectations, failure of parents to monitor their children, [and] excessively severe or inconsistent punishment.”
The lessons you learn in parenting classes will not only help you maintain your sanity during this challenging time of parenthood, but they can also “strengthen a child’s ability to survive and succeed.” Turning children into healthy contributors to society isn’t an innate human ability; you need to start reaching out for the information and resources you need to be a successful mom or dad.
While the term “parenting classes” rightly implies that your children are the main focus, the sessions will benefit more than just your role as a mother or father. When you practice being open, kind, fair and encouraging to your children, you may also find yourself adopting that same attitude toward other important people in your life such as your partner or friends. As one “graduate” of the parenting classes at The Family Center explains, “I think [these classes] have made me a better person. They are a good thing for all kinds of people and all kinds of problems.”
You may feel like you’re trudging through high school all over again as you watch your child slam doors and start shouting matches. By buckling down and signing up for a few parenting classes, though, you can make the most out of every year with your child. Don’t struggle alone; instead, find peace and community in the resources available to you. After all, don’t we all get along better with “a little help from our friends?”
