Hell hath no fury like a pregnant woman scorned.
Though that’s not exactly how William Congreve’s original quote goes, you should already know that pregnant women should not be messed with.
When a woman is busy bringing life into the world, she doesn’t have time to worry about ignorant side comments pertaining to her looks, diet or due date. But that doesn’t mean you can’t try and make her life easier.
For this purpose, ENTITY has compiled a list of the top seven things you should, at all costs, avoid telling an expectant woman. Pay attention.
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If wanting to touch a woman’s belly is awkward and inappropriate in general, it doesn’t make it any better when she’s pregnant. And it’s even worse when strangers touch them without asking. “This one might seem like a no-brainer, but every mama I know has some story about a stranger touching her pregnant belly,” says reality TV star and lifestyle guru Lauren Conrad.
I feel like writing a “what not to say/do to a pregnant woman” guide, starting with 1. Don’t pat her stomach like it’s a fucking Labrador.
— Victoria Glass (@victoria_glass) March 12, 2015
So unless she asks you first, just avoid any awkwardness and keep your hands on your own midsection.
Comments like “You look like you’re ready to pop” or “Wow you’re so big” aren’t going to cut it for pregnant women. Unless you’re looking to get one tired mama on your bad side, stick to something more positive.
WOW YOU’RE SO PREGNANT is not a thing to say to a pregnant woman as you round a corner toward her. #themoreyouknow
— Ashley Abramson (@ashleyabrmsn) December 28, 2016
As Jill Krause, parenting blogger at Baby Rabies, poignantly says in her viral video rant: “I don’t care if she looks like Jabba the Hutt incubating a small planet … [You say], ‘You look amazing.'” Any other comments are not appreciated.
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Even if you’re a close relative or friend, it’s best to refrain from asking what expectant mothers are planning on naming their children. Name lists are very personal and parents shouldn’t be pressured to share it if they’re not ready.
And as “Bachelor” alum Peyton Lambton explains on her blog, “It would break my heart to share a name I chose just to have someone tell me something negative about it.”
Some people may think it’s good advice to get as much sleep before the baby comes, but many pregnant women have trouble sleeping as it is.
“I think it’s a cruel joke,” says Elle Walker from What’s Up Moms. “Between the insomnia, the heartburn, the backache, I honestly prefer the sleep after my daughter was born. Even if there’s less of it.”
What can you say instead? The ultimate pregnancy go-to: “You look amazing.”
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The word you’re looking for is radiant.
Between the pregnancy fatigue and the constant discomfort as a child grows inside her, she’s tired and she definitely knows it. Pointing it out to her doesn’t help her feel any better.
“Thanks so much for pointing that out to me and making me feel even worse than I already do,” writes mommy blogger Denise Geelhart on Huffington Post. “Now I know that I’m not only fat but also look haggard.”
If you do, don’t be surprised to get a response along the lines of: “I’m hoping it’s a baby.”
Many parents actually choose not to find out the gender of the baby. So unless she tells you she hopes the baby is one or the other gender, just assume that the topic is off limits.
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When you’re eating for two, you’re obviously going to eat more food. A pregnant woman doesn’t need to hear snide comments like:
“You’re eating again?”
“Should you be eating that?”
“Are you sure that’s good for the baby?”
Many pregnant women are insecure enough about their image and they’re also well aware of their dietary restrictions. So instead, try something like, “That sure does look delicious.”
And if all else fails .. .just revert back to the good old “Wow, you’re glowing” comment.
